The New Southwest / An Unexpected Threat from Global Warming

An Unexpected Threat from Global Warming

As global temperatures rise and the potential for much greater warming becomes clear, researchers seem to discover new unexpected consequences of global climate change every day. I myself just stumbled upon what may become one of the most direct, immediate and catastrophic consequences of global warming yet: the thawing of the Blob.

The 1958 movie of the same name documents the story of a town terrorized by this red, jelly-like mass. The Blob emerges out of a small asteroid to feed on the flesh of humans, growing to the size of a small diner as it assimilates their vital energies. Throughout the horrific saga the Blob proves impervious to ordinary weapons, causing many involved to remark that it is indeed indestructible. Only at the last minute is it discovered that The Blob can be stopped only one way: by freezing.

The heroic villagers stop the Blob in its tracks with ice-cold CO2 from fire extinguishers, at which point government officials transport it via plane to the Arctic for safe keeping in perpetuity.

I shudder now as I recall the words of one brave youngster at the scene, who remarked “we’re safe now as long as the Arctic stays cold.” Little did he know that the very CO2 in the fire extinguishers would contribute to the Blob’s ultimate resurrection.

With Arctic temperatures rising fast, the effects of a reanimated Blob on the region’s fragile ecosystems are unknown. Given the Blob’s ability to expand in size exponentially and travel rapidly, it is also unknown how much protection the Blob’s remote location will ultimately provide for human communities.

If and when the Blob does awaken after 50 years of frozen slumber, only one thing is certain: it’s not going to be happy.